by Les Clarke

Synopsis

Billy Bignall tells everyone he was a music hall legend back in the day, but no-one really believes him and when he starts talking about showbiz, they tend to ignore him now; they’re fed up with listening to his make-believe-stories!  Billy has already had a falling out with Jack his best friend over it and Vicky had to intervene and calm them down and Morbid is acting very strangely and storms out talking about his own death!

The home has a new manager, Clive who wants to make some big changes which puts Matron’s nose out as it will cause disruption for the residents who like their set routines.  Clive has a holiday-camp background and wants to put on a show for the residents by the residents.  And having met Billy he wants him to be the star of the show. Elsie scoffs at the thought as she is another one who doesn’t believe a word about Billy and when Clive asks Billy he flatly refuses and won’t give a reason which further fuels the belief that he never did tread the boards back in the day.

Characters

(5m, 4f)

• Billy Bignall - mid 80s, short and well built, happy and full of life when he’s talking about showbiz, generally sad and wistful at other times (m)
• Jack Morgan (not Welsh) - early 70s, Billy’s best friend, always smartly dressed in collar and tie, witty sense of humour (m)
• Morbid - 82, very tall and thin, usually morose with the world on his shoulders (m)
• Matron (Hilary) - late 40s - early 50s, very proper and slightly old-fashioned, wears a blue uniform (f)
• Victoria - early to late 20s, bubbly and very friendly, truly cares about all the residents and they in turn love her for it, wears a white uniform (f)
• Clive Bannister - early 30s, full of life and modern ideas, slightly o.t.t. at times, fails to see when he’s making a complete pratt of himself, dresses casually (m)
• Elsie Tuttle - mid-to late 80s,  short, grumpy, knows her own mind, dislikes Billy (f)
• Rose Bagford - mid 60s, overweight, always wears grubby cardigans that are invariably buttoned up wrong, walks with the aid of a stick, has senile dementia (f)
• Alf Grainger - mid 80s, Northern, greatly admires Billy, needs a stick to assist with walking (m)