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Where There's A Will (Robbins)

    by Norman Robbins


       

Synopsis

Comedy Play Script: 'Where There's A Will' by Norman RobbinsThere's an old Yorkshire saying: "Where there's a will, there's relations", but even phlegmatic Northerners would raise an eyebrow when these dry-eyed mourners turn up for Edie Puddiphat's funeral. Each of them appears to have a will naming them as sole heir to the Puddiphat fortune which runs into millions of pounds.

Old Edie was no fool though, and has outwitted them all by leaving her final will in the hands of her caring god-child.

As the vultures circle, then reel in shock when each alternative will is revealed a fatal accident befalls the heiress, prompting a cunning plan for the others to get their hands on the cash. But, even as they conspire, a ruthless killer stalks the house and bodies fall like flies.


Duration

110 mins approx

Characters

Principals (2m, 5f)

  • Genista Royal - a harassed looking woman in her sixties, wearing dark mourning clothes
  • Velma Newton - in her fifties, extremely waspish, and wearing expensive mourning clothes, complete with veiled hat, open topcoat and matching accessories.
  • Fordyce Newton – Velma’s 30 year old step-son, distinctly precious, dressed in an expensive dark suit, and overcoat.
  • Miriam Holt - in her late forties, slightly overweight, wearing a black suit a little too small for her, and high heels, much too high
  • Bella Moore - in her early forties, heavily made-up and wears a brilliant red two- piece suit with matching accessories and high-heeled, peep-toe shoes.
  • Donna Moore - in her twenties  and heavily pregnant. Thick mascara smears her over-heavy make-up and she clutches a crumpled, cosmetic smeared handkerchief.. Tartily dressed, and bedecked with cheap silver bracelets, rings, and facial furnishings, she is the perfect match for the muscular Troy.
  • Troy Jarvis – in his twenties, not too bright, sports a variety of ear-rings, eyebrow and nose rings, etc. He wears faded, distressed jeans and a sleeveless leather jerkin over a shirtless  torso that boasts a collection of gaudy tattoos.

Support (1m, 1f)

  • Rev Arthur Peasegood - in his late sixties, earnest and full of good-will. He wears a dark suit and  dog collar
  • Cissie Cunningham - is over seventy, and  although somewhat frail and supporting herself on a stick, she is quite alert. Like the others, she is dressed in mourning and carries a handbag

       

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